Ughhhh---kids

Why why why do we have kids? Okay they can be so awesome, but then they can really try your nerves. Ready to hear what I'm so mad about. Jaden stepped on my macbook pro. It cracked the screen. The whole screen looks like a printer test page, except for the bottom right corner. So I opened my internet then shrunk it to a tiny box and moved that tiny box to the right corner. The box is so small that you can hardly see enough to do anything. I can't read anything across the top of the computer.  I can't see to shut down the computer or do anything like that. I want to scream. Actually, she has tested my patience so much in the last few weeks that I haven't even reacted yet to it. I think I'm numb to reacting to her. She's such a hard little cookie. Her seizures have really helped me have more patience for her. When you have to watch your little girl suffer through a seizure it really melts and softens your heart. And in my case lately it's watch it nearly every hour and sometimes more. If it weren't for that I think I would beat her. Oh because she did it intentionally. I came in and saw it and asked what happened, she smiled and said, "I stepped on it."

It's a good thing I bought the extra insurance on it, but it's going to be a pain to get fixed. I'm going to have to send it to apple and then who knows how long that's going to take. We're going to have to pull one of our old IBM's out of the garage and fire it up before I send this off. I can't live without a computer and internet. Especially, right now with Jaden's seizures. 

Well, I came in here to post about the day. It's been a crappy day for her seizure wise. This morning was okay, but then the afternoon and early evening were horrible. She had a lot of seizures. I'm used to them so they don't scare me. They usually only last about 30 seconds. This afternoon she had one that was about 2 min. It was different than the rest. It scared me. Usually her eyes dilate during a seizure, she clenches her fists, her whole body tightens up, she curls into a fetal position, slightly convulses,  and kind of screams This one was  totally different. Her eyes rolled up in her head, All the muscles in her face were twitching, and her tongue was doing a weird thing, and she was making a weird gurgling noise. When it was over she belched 3 times really loud and she was slurring her words for about a minute or two. It scared me to death. I have diastat. It's a rectal medication that the doctors gave me to take with me when I travel and to have in the house. It's an emergency medication that epileptics have to have on hand. Anyway, you're not suppose to use it unless the seizure lasts for longer than 5 minutes. I don't want to ever have to give her it, but I do have some on hand. After that seizure she had a handful more of her normal ones for the next 2 hours. Then the rest of the evening has gone well. She went about 3 hours without one. (Until about 5 min. ago she had another one.) 

I think I have totally rambled. I hope this makes sense to anyone. I'm off to bed.